In Front Of The Yellow Line
By Shawn Wells
Japanese Efficiency
I started writing my last post and it got away from me. I realized how much more I want to say about my experiences in Japan. So instead of making you read an entire novel, I decided to do what the 'Twilight' books did with their movies and split the last part of my trilogy into 2 parts. Of course I feel dirty using 'Twilight' as an example, and even though Harry Potter did the same thing with it's SEVENTH book, the more direct comparison is, ugh, 'Twilight'. Or maybe this one will get away from me too and I'll end up pulling the Peter Jackson/Hobbit treatment and talking about Japan in three parts.
Ok... Not a movie blog. Time to move forward with:
Historical Blog 3: Tokyo Drift (Part 2)
October 7th, 2018
I'm an expert on how to use the trains in Japan now, time to test my skills. My lovely travel companion and I move on to Tokyo on a Shinkansen... The ol' Japanese bullet train. Let me tell you, that's a hell of a thing. Part VIA Rail (or Amtrak if you're American) and part, I dunno... "Land Jet" might be the way to put it (but with more leg room than an "Air Jet") this marvel travels over 300 km/hr. A smooth, fast and quiet way to travel the country.
We had done a day trip to Yokohama (Cup Noodle Museum totally worth checking out) on our way so we didn't actually arrive in Tokyo until about 8 o'clock at night. Now, remember when I said I'm an expert at trains in Japan now? I discovered that I was still drastically unprepared for "Tokyo Station" (nice easy name to remember, finally!) Even at 8pm, this station was bustling with activity. Like the inside of a beehive. My first thought was "Holy crap! What is rush hour like?!?" Immediately I could see the difference between a city of 3 million people vs. a city of 30 million. I had the foundation of HOW to use the trains, now I just had the new larger crowds to adapt to. And FYI, Tokyo Station is only the 8th busiest station in Japan. That's right... This was a light crowd compared to some others.
One thing I saw a lot of in Japan was places where they employed double (if not more) the amount of people to do a particular job than they would back home. For instance, back home I will see someone changing the posters in our bus shelters. They will have a long stick propping up the glass window while they change the poster. In Japan, I saw the same job being done by 3 employees at the same time. One was holding the glass up, one was washing the glass and the third changing the posters. (How many Japanese does it take to screw in a lightbulb? That wouldn't be a joke there... That would be a legitimate question.) The other employment thing that I saw a lot of was people working jobs you'd never see back home. The number one most bizarre transit related job has to be The Pusher.
Did you know that in some parts of Japan (Tokyo especially) the trains get so crowded during rush hours that they have employees whose job it is to literally push people into the trains? They help push and stuff the people inside so that the doors will close. They're shoehorns for people. (Man... I wish that was actually what their job title was! "What do you do for a living?" "I'm a shoehorn.") I'm sure there are other things in their job descriptions, but I don't know what they are. You just see a lot of official looking Japanese people patrolling around. I tried to convince my travel companion to take a ride in a shoehorn train because why not? She didn't go for it. We saw some busy trains, but not shoe horn busy.
Here's another good one... If you there's a problem or you can't figure out how to use the ticket machine, you push the help button for assistance. You expect someone to come running from somewhere in the building or some kind of intercom system. Instead, a panel beside the ticket machine itself opens up and there's your helper, sitting in a room that's right behind the ticket machine. They employ someone to watch the machinery. I mean, it makes sense. To keep stations like that operating well, you'd want technicians and help desk people on site. But in my previous post, I mentioned how many different ticket machines there are and they aren't all in the same place. So it makes me wonder, how many Japanese people are sitting in little rooms behind ticket machines in Japan? Is it every ticket machine in the whole country? In our travels, we found ONE station in the middle of nowhere outside Kyoto that was unmanned by any employees at all. Honor system at that one. The gates aren't even plugged in.
Segue.
Previously, I also mentioned the gate keepers. More people employed to sit and watch technology do it's thing. In a way I guess they are also security or something, but there's a few of them (plus yet more official looking people milling about) at every gate. Several gates per station. Hundreds of stations per city.... That's a lot of employees! I also noticed every train had a minimum of 3 people working it. 2 that stood up front (one driver and one... "Spotter" maybe is what you'd call them? Bodyguard? I dunno) and one that rode in the other end (I'd say this would be another "spotter"... They make sure everything is clear and have their head hanging out the window). There was even one case where I saw a train with a VIP Car... When this one pulled in, 2 well dressed "Doormen" stepped out onto the platform and waited to greet passengers who have the VIP Pass while they bow at passerbys. Meanwhile, back home, our trains have one employee operating it who switches ends on the train when it's time to go the other way.
And the bathrooms in the subway stations. The bathrooms were as nice (if not nicer... Man I miss those Japanese wonder toilets) as just about any fancy restaurant back home. In a subway! You'd never get away with granite in a subway bathroom where I live. Some morons would ruin it for everyone. Where I live, you have to push a button and get buzzed in to the washrooms after security downtown has had a chance to see you on camera. But the Japanese have toilets that spray your butt in THEIR subway bathrooms.
In Osaka, my first day in Japan, I saw someone use an emergency assistance bell on one of the trains. Someone had passed out and collapsed on the floor of one of the cars. The emergency lights were flashing and within seconds there were 6 official looking people running towards the train. Maybe THAT'S the other thing "pushers" do. So impressive. I'm quite confident you'd never see immediate response like that where I live.
Everything talks to you in Japan. Everything plays music to you. Or that's how it seems. It's not a lot of unpleasant noise, at any rate. And a lot of things are catered to the blind which I found very cool. Throughout the cities in the high pedestrian areas, you'll find a strip of tile in the sidewalks that has grooves in it which someone with a cane can easily follow along and feel with their feet. All this stuff flowed down into the subway stations. At the bottom of the bannisters, you'd find Braille saying (presumably) last step, or something. Through one of the stations, I followed one of these paths (it's not hard, they're bright yellow and bumpy. Except in fancier districts where they use fancier tiles.) At each fork in the road, there's a tile with a different texture to warn you. I ended up coming to a bathroom (once again, I love Japanese subway bathrooms!) Outside of the bathrooms is a map on the wall showing the station (on which the bathroom I'm standing outside of is depicted on... Are you following me still?) As I step up to this map, a voice comes on overhead (must be on a sensor... Everything talks in Japan. Even the escalators.) which tells me (presumably again, because this one didn't have an English translation) about the map in front of me. The map itself, has a plexiglass cover that has Braille over the words on the map. And the bathroom, which I'm standing outside of, has a tactile map of that bathroom so you can know the layout before going in. I love the Japanese! If I was blind, I'd be able to navigate safely, listen to the little pre-recorded message (which begins with a little musical chime as if politely saying "pardon me"... Because everything plays music in Japan.) and feel my way around the bathroom before going in. Genius.
Fun fact that I learned on a open roof bus sightseeing tour of Tokyo. The amazing train system is a result of the 1964 Tokyo Olympics. They needed efficient ways to transport athletes and spectators around the city so voila! The Tokyo train system was born.
In Japan, you don't just need bullet trains to go longer distances. A lot of the town's are interconnected. We took a trip to a smaller city called Nara (where tame deer roam the park and the temple of the giant Buddha... You can feed the deer and they bow to you.) for this trip, we took a "regular" train.
In a town called Hakone (in my previous post I mentioned mispronounced Japanese words... This is pronounced "AH-ko-nay" not "HA-cone") we missed out on a gondola and boat ride because a typhoon had blown through the day before and so conditions weren't ideal and they we're closed. So in Hakone, we traveled around by bus. That's where I found out how the payment process on a Japanese bus works (see previous post.) And bus drivers dress fancy in Japan. They get white gloves and ties and fancy police style hats. I'm actually a little jealous of drivers uniforms in Japan. I could be fancy.
Incidentally, typhoon is one of the few things that wreaks havoc on the trains and schedules in Japan. The night of the typhoon, we had to be back in our hotel by 6 pm because the trains were going to stop running. Tokyo shut down at 6 that night. Strangely enough though, Tokyo is not an all night city. Shutting down at 6 was only 6 hours earlier than normal. Tokyo stops operating shortly after midnight. Not completely, obviously... But the trains stop running and you have to try to get on to the... Midnight train.
Earlier when I said I couldn't convince my partner to take a ride on the shoehorn train, the midnight train is one of those busy ones I referred to and one night we couldn't avoid it. We met up with a friend that was living in Japan. He showed us a cool little bar district called "Golden Gai". Hundreds of tiny bars. When I say tiny, I mean each one sat a dozen or less. Just three blocks of tiny bars side by side and stacked. Anyway, the night was fun but it couldn't go too late because otherwise you have a choice to make. Party all night (I'm too old for that), pray you can get a cab and pay way too much, walk, or midnight train. We chose midnight train. The platform was packed, people pushing in like sardines. Everyone HAD TO be on this train or they were stranded (perfect excuse to stay in a capsule hotel, which I did do one night. Had to. When in Japan, right?) That was the craziest train ride if the whole trip.
Thank you for listening to my ramblings. I had such an amazing trip and I recommend anyone go if you've ever thought if going. I'd love to go on about everything non-busblog related but I think I've already meandered as far off my train of thought (pun 100% intended) as I dare. So I leave you with one of the most ironic things about this whole post. In all of this, I've mentioned just how many people have unexpected jobs in Japan. People that are seemingly hired to stand there. I saw one guy who was directing people around a pylon with a lit up wand. He was doing the job of a pylon, FOR a pylon. Yet when it came to the bus drivers at the end of the night, I saw them cleaning their own buses. Out of all the amazing things about Japan and Japanese efficiency, that's one thing that we have and they don't... People to clean our buses. I'm too fancy for that... Even without the fancy Japanese bus driver uniform.
Domo Arigato, Japan. You were the coolest.
From in front of the yellow line, that's how I see it.